Change your mind

It doesn’t matter that you surrender, give up, let go, forgive, move on or put it behind you. It’s going to remain in your mind. It’s going to surface every now and then, usually when you are at your weakest or most vulnerable. It’s going to duplicate inside of you similar feelings to when it was actually happening. What can you do?

Three steps. First of all you have to firmly tell yourself INHN. Shout it to yourself if necessary. INHN (pronounced in hin) stands for It’s Not Happening Now. Secondly, look around. What IS actually going on now? Focus on now. Breathe. Inhale to a slow count of four. Hold it for a slow count of four. Exhale to a slow found of four. Hold it for a slow count of four. Repeat if necessary.

Don’t make the mistake of trying to figure out what caused you to remember. That’s a trap that keeps you connected and keeps it very alive. You may come up with a truth but not necessarily the truth. You don’t need to figure this stuff out for the millionth time. You need to put your thoughts elsewhere.

Thoughts that disturb you have energy and passion to them. In order to displace them you need to have thoughts that are equally or better yet, more energized and passion filled. These are not just going to occur to you. You will have some homework to do. Thirdly, when you are feeling good, write down three or four thoughts that really floats your boat. From real incidences or from your imagination (your mind can’t tell the difference) find those scenarios that make you feel really, really excited. Keep that list with you and refer to it as often as you need it. Pretty soon, every time your past pulls a knife, you’ll pull a gun. You win every time.

(c)2013 All Rights Reserved, Patrick McBride
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