And the answer is…

April 25th, 2011

Are you worrying? Are you worrying about more than one issue? The answer to these two questions is usually a resounding YES! Do you feel guilty about worrying? Do you feel that you should be more positive, more reliant on faith? Usually another yes right here. The most important question however is How do I stop Worrying? And the answer is …

Okay, I’ll get to that in a minute but first I want to congratulate you for worrying. That’s right, congratulate you. You see, if you weren’t so involved, so caring, so responsible you wouldn’t be worrying like you do. If you didn’t desire a better way of living for yourself and others, you’d have nothing to worry about right now. But you do worry and you do care and you do fear things getting worse and you do worry about the effect of that on you and those you love. Congratulations, you are a wonderful, caring human being.

I’m not about to give you the old think positive and everything will be positive. I personally think that doing only that is a bunch of fertilizer but what I will tell you is …

Okay, I’ll get to that in a moment but first I want to let you know that nothing is hopeless, nothing is beyond your power to influence it. The issues that are in your life are in your life because you can actually affect them. Maritime law in Somalia is not a worry for you for the simple fact that you cannot influence it in any way with your skills and your access right now but the issues that are in your life are there because you can influence them. Your worries are very real and a very important part of your life. You can’t just erase them with some hocus pocus and nor should you. The answer to your worrying is…

Here, finally, is the answer. You kept reading to this point because you know me and /or my writings and you knew that I would not leave you without an answer. You knew that something was coming that would have some value. In other words, you EXPECTED an answer from me and that is the main reason that you are getting it. Expectation of a good solution is the very first step in getting it. Worrying is good but it is only good as a indicator of what you need to fix. Once something has caused you to worry, thank the worry and let it go. Holding on to it is like holding on to a screaming smoke alarm, pretty soon it will drive you crazy. The smoke alarm was never meant to be the focus. It is the signal that something needs fixing. Put it down and EXPECT to fix the problem NOT the smoke alarm. Worrying isn’t your problem. Don’t work on it! What are you worrying about? Work on that. EXPECT a solution. Keep going. Take action. EXPECT a solution. You can do it. Take all the time you need. Patience+expectation+action-worry=SOLUTION!
When you expect a solution and take action, it has to show up. That’s the secret.

(c)2011 All Rights Reserved, Patrick McBride


Do you still have the flame?

April 18th, 2011

Imagine a pile of firewood. Now imagine all that could be done with that firewood, cooking, heating, melting ore, boiling water for steam, etc. The potential of a pile of firewood is almost unlimited but what if there is no flame, no spark to ignite it? In that case the firewood, perfect as it may be, will just rot away.

The firewood is your dreams and goals. The flame is your action. No matter how incredible and definitive your goals are (they are, aren’t they?) without action they will just rot away. Get used to setting goals. Set a goal for what you want to accomplish in the next hour. Write it down and take action. Do it again for the following hour. Write it down and take action.What do you want to do with this month, year or life? Write it down and take action. Oh, I hear you, you are one of those “It will all work out for the best” kinda people. Well, let me ask you …is your life as good and fulfilling as it could be? If it is, congratulations. If you think it could even be a tiny bit better, you need goals (firewood) and action (flame).

Most of us fear to take action for one of two reasons. We either took action and failed miserably and locked that door or we refuse to take action because if we do, we can no longer blame someone else or some outside force for things not going as we planned. BUT, what if you took action and it really worked out better than you ever imagined? What if you took action and your life instantly improved by a measurable amount? What if you really stuck you neck out and went for it and it worked out? What if you succeeded in the next thing you took action on? IT CAN HAPPEN!!

Maybe you think that you failed too many times in a business or a relationship or a diet or an idea and you never want to go through that again. Well if that is the case, go climb into a coffin because life is over for you. BUT, if you still have even the smallest flame burning inside of you, go for it again. Dust off your dreams, refresh your goals, throw doubts out the window, duct tape the little naysayer voice in your head and TAKE ACTION! Believe in yourself again. Believe in yourself maybe for the first time. Embrace your life and its gazillion of possibilities. Forget positive thinking and concentrate on positive action. There will be plenty of time for positive thinking later. Right now you have to dream of what could be. Right now you have to begin. How do you really want to live? Go for it. How do you really want to love? Go for it? Who do you really want to be? Go for it. What do you really want to do? Go for it. Take a deep breath…now exhale. The rest of your life just started. Go for it.

(c)2011 All Rights Reserved, Patrick McBride


Throw the Creatures Out!

April 11th, 2011

Upon that which we dwell will become our Heaven or our hell. It really seems so simple. Simple on the surface but so terribly hard to implement. If there is something that bothers you right now or something from the past that keeps bothering you, how do you get it out of your mind? You know that good thoughts can make you feel good and that upsetting thoughts can make you feel… well…upsetting. If we were to choose between Heavenly thoughts and hellacious thoughts, we would always choose the one that feels better. (Pssst..Unless you are in a really crappy mood, the Heavenly one should feel better) But what if we just can’t shake certain thoughts of loss or betrayal or fear or regret? “Be very, very careful what you put in your head, because you will never, ever get it out” said Thomas Cardinal Wolsey in the 16th Century. So, are we doomed to listening to the same bad song in our heads for the rest of our lives? NO, NO, NO!

What would you do if a group of surly, non-respectful, agitating creatures (I have to say creatures because if I actually name anything on earth that should be rejected, somebody will write and tell me that they love them, rescue them and have seen infinity in their eyes) showed up at your door? Would you invite them in? Maybe give them your bed to sleep in? Maybe serve up your family for them to devour? Of course not!! But that’s exactly what we do when we start entertaining an upsetting thought that shows up. That upsetting thought that we CHOOSE to entertain changes our mood and screws around with our sleep, our health and inflicts itself upon our friends and family.

The answer to all of this is REJECT and SWITCH. Your feelings are always the perfect sensor for what you are thinking. When you first get that telltale feeling that your thoughts are in the realm of the unwanted, you need to take immediate action! REJECT the thought that you are thinking. Immediately stop the thought. Do not finish the sentence. Do not wait for the microsecond of pleasure that comes from imagining a different outcome than the truth. Just stop and instantly SWITCH to thinking a better thought. A thought that you have practiced and written down. A thought that equals the intensity of the thought you are ignoring. You can’t have a thought about a horrible break up and expect that the thought of a sunflower is going to take it’s place. Fill that space as quickly as you can with an intense thought that makes you feel good. It’s not easy but it can and should be done. With practice, you will once again command the helm of your ship and you will go where you wish to go and not be driven by ill winds. Think the thoughts that make you feel good. You deserve it.

(c)2011 All Rights Reserved, Patrick McBride


Stress? Bah Humbug!

April 4th, 2011

“I’m stressed!” It seems to be the universal answer for everything. Getting fat -I’m stressed! Not getting enough sleep -I’m stressed. Health issues, relationship issues, job issues, children issues,money issues, parent issues, you name it and we got an answer for it -I’m stressed. So we exercise and detoxify and yogatize and sleep apneatize or we eat and eat or smoke or drink or medicate or we just go 1000 miles an hour with the hope that we will do some good and be remembered for all we sacrificed before we burn out in a fiery crash.

Whoa! Is that it? Is that what it has all come to? Life limiting stress or destruction? No, no, no! A thousand times no! We need to take back our lives. They are a gift, a precious, wonderful, priceless gift. Your life and mine were meant to revolve around love and caring for ourselves and others. We have to understand that our focus is off. It’s like getting your eyes dilated at the eye doctor and bright lights are really bright so you wear dark glasses until it passes. What would happen if the effects passed but you kept the glasses on? The world would seem awfully dark. Everything would seem scary and stressful. You see, that’s what happened to all of us. Somewhere along the way we heard or saw that there were really good people, big bright shining lights but we weren’t as good as them so we put on the dark glasses of cynicism and doubt to make them seem less bright not knowing that it turned everything else in our world darker and that became our false view of reality.

We don’t have wild, out of control stress. We have opportunities to find solutions to seemingly impossible problems. History is full of it happening with incredible outcomes. We don’t have anxiety, we have excitement about what is going to happen next but instead of being expectant of something good, we expect only darkness. We don’t have relationship problems with others, we have relationship problems with ourselves and our Divine connections. We don’t have children that won’t listen, we have a mouth that speaks from what we have been taught and not from what we have felt. We don’t have money problems, we have an inability to believe that we can be worth more. We don’t have health issues, we have repair issues. We can do so much if we only change our glasses. No one ever regretted taking off their dark glasses and putting on the rose colored ones but many people think they are too stressed to try. Thank God you and I are not one of them!

(c)2011 All Rights Reserved, Patrick McBride