March 16th, 2017

You don’t fall in love with the person. You fall in love with the spirit inside that person. That’s why as people get older and go through so many physical changes, the love still grows. You don’t fall in love with a pet, you fall in love with the spirit inside that pet. You don’t fall in love with a flower or a bird or a place. You fall in love with the spirit that is inside each of those. 

On the outside, everything and everyone is wearing some kind of costume. Some attract and some repel. It’s all part of a enormous masquerade. The music of life plays and we all dance. 

The costumes are ever changing. If it were not for the costumes we would hardly notice any differences. We would smile and nod and love. But throw a costume on every spirit and we can act outraged or amazed or any one of an infinite number of responses. 

When you truly love something or someone you love their spirit. When you can truly know that you are in love with their spirit you will find that the costume means nothing. And if the costume means nothing for one it means nothing for all. 

Dance with seven billion people costumes. Dance with trillions of tree costumes and bird costumes and rock costumes and fish costumes. Dance with one, Dance with dozens or Dance with them all. Dance until you laugh. Dance until you forget your costume. Dance until you forget theirs.

Today is my birthday and I love you and your costume. Thank you for this dance.  

Sundrops On Life -Better Thoughts. Better Days.

 Patrick McBride

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A plan

February 13th, 2017

We were out feeding the homeless one day and when you are engaged with that part of our community no two days are ever the same because the actions and reactions vary greatly from one person to the next. Anyway, every now and then something is said that is up there with the sayings of the great philosophers. 

For instance, one day I was handing out small bars of hotel soap that had been donated to us and Moses Green, a regular, took the bar with a giant grin and said “Right now I would rather have this than a bar of gold” and I said “Moses, with a bar of gold you could buy a truck full of soap” and he replied “Patrick, where is a dirty, homeless person going to sell a bar of gold? You have to understand that the way you are dressed is the way you are treated”. Priceless

This particular day we were handing out food and a very disheveled gentleman who had been carrying on a passionate conversation with no one in particular, took the food I was offering and after staring silently at me for a few moments and deeming me worthy of his advice, said “Do you know why I am on the street? Why in fact most of us are out here?” and without waiting for my reply he said ” I didn’t have money or a job or any help and that was like having leaks in my boat but the thing that actually sunk my boat was that I didn’t have a plan. A plan is what keeps you going man, gives you hope. A plan can always be altered and improved but you know what? If you ain’t got a plan you got nothing and nothing can’t be altered or improved. If you don’t want to end up nowhere, you gotta have a plan, man!” He turned around and restarted his passionate conversation with no one in particular and walked away.

I never knew his name or saw him again but I thank that philosopher in baggy clothes quite often. Whenever things don’t work out the way I wanted, instead of fretting and complaining, my first inclination thanks to this gentleman, is to ask myself “Okay, this didn’t work out the way I wanted so how do I alter my plan or come up with a new plan?”. 

Whenever I feel adrift or unproductive, instead of analyzing every thought and action and finding fault or laying blame (all the while accomplishing absolutely nothing), I get right to work on my overall plan and alter it if I can or if I can’t, I come up with a new plan as quickly as possible and then with map in hand I can move forward again. Like I heard on East Lancaster, “If you don’t want to end up nowhere, you gotta have a plan, man!”

Sundrops On Life -Better Thoughts. Better Days.

 Patrick McBride

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February 6th, 2017

Is this relationship worth it? All throughout our life we are in relationships. We have relationships with people, companies, governments, etc. Today, let’s talk about our people relationships. 

Whether we are in a work, friend or significant other relationship with another person there are constantly millions of dynamics at work. Sometimes they work seamlessly and sometimes they don’t. When they do, it’s a little slice of heaven. When they don’t, the upsets can be catastrophic to your well being on every level. 

If you are going to walk away every time a relationship upsets you, you are going to have an infinite number of very, very short relationships and you will never know the joy of a deep, give and take relationship. However, if you are going to put up with upsets let’s have some rules.

Rule#1- Physical violence or even the threat of physical violence is instant termination, no warning necessary.

Rule#2- Bullying, verbal abuse, outright or in the guise of “I was only joking”, instant termination after one and only one warning.

Rule#3- Being drunk or high is never an excusable reason for treating you badly. Instant termination after one warning unless rule #1 is breached than no warning is due.

Rule#4- You don’t have permission to be a jerk because they are a jerk.

Rule#5- You may be real, real close but you are not them and they are not you.

Rule#6- People change. That includes you.

Rule#7- Sometimes it is nothing in particular. It is just time to move on.

Rule#8- NEVER count on changing someone else! You will never get a cat to bark and trying only frustrates you and pisses off the cat.

Rule#9- When it is really LOVE, you won’t have to talk yourself into it.

 Don’t expect or, heaven’s forbid, demand perfection in a relationship and remember that all relationships should be beneficial to both people. One-sided relationships are awful. If it’s good, enjoy every moment. Who knows, it could last a lifetime. If it’s bad, don’t wait too long to jump overboard. It is never a good idea to go down with the ship.

Review your relations every now and then to make sure that you haven’t gotten too comfortable with less than you deserve. Reviewing also helps to know if you are getting lazy and taking the other person for granted. Ask yourself often “Am I loving and present to my full potential?” and “Is our relationship as good as it can be?” and “How can I be better at this?”.

Relationships are everything you can imagine and so much more. Be realistic about your role and what you want in the other person. Be as loving, caring and supportive as you can be all the time and never, ever, ever expect the cat to bark.  


Sundrops On Life -Better Thoughts. Better Days.

 Patrick McBride

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September 19th, 2016

There is a certain sweetness to life. It doesn’t mean that every day is a day at the beach but there is a certain sweetness in every day. Maybe it’s a glimpse of a white puffy cloud or maybe seeing a butterfly in the city or maybe it’s some distant laughter or the smile of a child. Sometimes it just surprises you and sometimes you have to search like a pearl diver running out of air to find it.​​​​​​​

 Imagine a tightly sealed jar of honey and imagine that you put it into a big vat of sour pickles. Wait a couple of hours and then take it out, rinse it off and open the jar and take a spoonful. Does it taste like pickles or honey? Honey of course! But why? The sweet honey was sealed in a glass jar. Nothing could get in no matter how many hours it stayed in the sour brine.

 You have the ability in every moment of your life to put a non porous barrier between you and your surroundings. We do it often. Walk through any tourist area amongst the panhandlers and aggressive vendors. Get squished into a crowded elevator or subway car. You instinctively put up that barrier and you turn your thoughts inward and many times you find sweetness inside in your thoughts and memories and everything becomes bearable.

 If you find yourself surrounded by sour circumstances, leave if you can but if you can’t, then put up that barrier and intentionally search for the sweetness in your thoughts and memories.

 Let the sweetness come in and savor it and always make it more important than any sourness outside. 

Sundrops On Life -Better Thoughts. Better Days.

 Patrick McBride

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September 12th, 2016

A fellow wrote to me this morning and told me, when I asked how he was doing, that he was doing badly because it was Monday. He said his health was fine and his family was fine but that he was miserable because it was Monday. He said that he had always felt this way. 

 Math is not my forte but I figured I could handle this calculation. Figuring that the Mondays between ages one day and five years probably weren’t that much of a burden and the fact that most people live to about eighty years of age, then seventy five years times fifty two weeks would give you three thousand and nine hundred Mondays to be miserable on. Divide that by three hundred and sixty five days and it would be over ten years of life to be in a state of miserableness. 

 Now I don’t know what your limit for being miserable is but I have a zero tolerance for being miserable. I have railed against authority most of my life and so I am certainly not going to let the calendar tell me how to feel. I don’t love more because it’s Valentines Day. I don’t get more grateful because it’s Thanksgiving. I don’t wait for New Years Eve to make new beginnings. Every day is a day to be maximally loving, maximally thankful, maximally celebratory, maximally happy.

 Stop feeling bad because it’s a day to pay bills or to exercise or work or travel. It is a precious gift! It is a day, in a limited amount of days. It is twenty four hours of possibilities. 

 We know that any life can be adversely changed in the blink of an eye and most of us expect it sooner or later. Did you know that the opposite is also true? That any life can be positively changed in a blink of an eye with a thought, a touch, a look, a word, a sound, a scent, an idea, a desire, a prayer, a sight, a laugh and most of us don’t expect it?

  Don’t look to the calendar to tell you how to feel. Don’t look to the folks around you to know how to feel. Don’t look into your past or future for guidance. 

 Right now say to yourself –  “This is now. I am alive and capable of having better thoughts. I can and will enjoy this day because I deserve happiness and I know that I am the only one who can increase or decrease my happiness.”

 If you are in charge of your happiness (and you are) than open wide those gates of happiness. Let it rush in and wash away doubt and fear and anxiety. Never let a day go by that you wouldn’t want to live over again. Yes, it can be that good. You know it can.

    Sundrops On Life -Better Thoughts. Better Days.​​​​​​​

(c)2016 All Rights Reserved, Patrick McBride

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Look around

August 1st, 2016

Where is your happiness? Is it in your dwelling? Is it in your yoga mat or gym? Is it in your friends or lovers? Is it in nature? Is it in your memories, your books? Is it in your food? Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes and yes.

Your happiness is all around you all the time. Anything can trigger the happiness you want to feel. For instance, everything you own you cherished when you desired it and obtained it. The little amulets and books and clothes and hundreds of other objects you own elicited your happiness at one point. That happiness trigger is still in every piece you own. Everything of yours is imprinted with your original happiness.

It is your perception that has cast a shadow on all your happiness. What was once “OMG!” is now “Oh, that old thing”. Like an abandoned pet, all your possessions now just sit and wait. Maybe a visitor will bring attention back to it. Maybe it will be given to a friend or grandchild and it will once again be loved and cherished. 

We are okay with the earth being alive and thoughts being real things and plants and animals and trees having feelings but somehow our “things” are just there.

Ask any scientist and they will tell you that all matter is energy. Ask me, I will tell you that all energy is love. You and I and all of our things are made of the same energy. 

Forget about generating happiness or finding happiness. When you are home look around at your stuff, your things, and tap into the memory of when you first received them. Feel that feeling again. I guarantee that you won’t have to go looking around for happiness because you will realize that everything that you have is a happiness trigger. 

While you are recapturing all this happiness with your fresh perception, don’t be surprised if a whole bunch of gratefulness rushes in with the happiness. Just look around with a fresh, new vision and be happy.  

Sundrops On Life – Better Thoughts. Better Days. 

(c)2016 All Rights Reserved, Patrick McBride

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July 25th, 2016

Tomorrow morning, if you are lucky, you will wake up. Within minutes you will form expectations for your day. Maybe those expectations will be formed by your health or your job or what happened today or your to do list or maybe even the weather. 

Those expectations will be a pretty good indicator of how your day will go. Your expectations are the blueprint for your day and for your life. Sure, some days will vary from what’s in your expectations but most days will stick pretty close to it. 

Well, if we have expectations and our days go along with those expectations, it should be pretty easy to have great days by creating great expectations. Right? 

Not so fast. Our expectations can take us to better days but the problem is that our expectations are so low that greatness in any area is far away. As we age, every time our expectations are not manifested we lower our expectations. When a relationship falters, lower. When a health crisis hits, lower. When a gamble turns into a loss, lower. When we don’t realize success in any area, lower. 

Pretty soon our expectations are so low that we feel like we are doing okay if we are merely surviving.

It can be better. It will take a serious amount of effort but it can be much better. When I was in boot camp in the Marines some recruits were astonished that when they got hurt or tired or sick they were forced to continue. Their expectations and the expectations of the drill instructor were not the same. The higher expectations of the drill instructor is what caused them to grow, to persevere, to attain goals that they thought impossible for themselves. 

 We need to be our own drill instructors. If you want to succeed in dieting or reshaping your body or having better relationships or more money you are going to have to have bigger and better expectations for yourself and you will have to WRITE THEM DOWN AND FOLLOW THEM WITH NO EXCUSES ALLOWED!

If you are lucky enough to wake up tomorrow morning and if when you awaken you immediately bring to mind a positive expectation and follow your blueprint without excuses….you’ll get the life that you dreamed of but have come to think of as impossible. Bigger expectations + no excuses = Everything you want. 

Sundrops On Life – Better Thoughts. Better Days. 

(c)2016 All Rights Reserved, Patrick McBride

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May 3rd, 2016

We may never touch mortar and brick but we still build walls. We build walls around our past transgressions. We don’t want to be reminded nor do we want anyone else to see them. We build walls around our heart so that no one may enter and hurt us. We have been hurt in love and that is where we were most tender so that wall must be the strongest of all. 

We build walls around our perceived weaknesses. We are assured by our mind that someone will take advantage of our weakness should they see it. We build walls in front of us so that our view of our inevitable demise will be hidden from us. We build walls against the unknowns in our life, against all that is in conflict with our beliefs and comfort.

What do we get with all these walls? Security? Contentment? Stability? Hardly. We are more anxious than ever. Life cannot be stopped. It will find a way over, under or through any wall we build. Like the flower that grows in a crack in the sidewalk, life will get through. 

Don’t all these walls offer some protection? No. Our mind sees it as protection but the truth is that all we are creating with all these walls is a maze and the more walls, the more difficult the maze. No wonder we feel lost at times. So, what’s the answer?

Tear down your walls. Come out from behind them. Bare your body, mind and spirit to each day. Greet life with open arms. Embrace it. Let your resistance to life dissolve in a bright, iridescent pool of gratitude and love. Yes, you are opening yourself to the good, the bad and the ugly parts of life but you will be 100% alive. 

Physical death will find every one of us some day. Will it find you cowering behind your dark, damp walls or will it find you out in the sunshine enjoying every moment? Security is an illusion. Living is a gift. Dismiss the illusion and open the gift.
Patrick McBride’s Sundrops On Life 

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February 22nd, 2016

Look in a full length mirror and what do you see? Do you see the imperfections? Does what you see fall short of the ideal picture that you have in your mind? Do you see a body that has been wounded by a lack of sleep?

Let me tell you what you don’t see. The mirror doesn’t tell you that your lack of sleep is due to your worrying about your friends and family. It doesn’t reflect the loss of sleep because you didn’t have the money that you thought would help someone. It doesn’t show you the many nights that you stayed on the phone listening to someone who said they had no one else to call. The mirror can’t show you how very much you care.

What you see in the mirror does not reflect the ideal in your mind because the ideal in your mind is a two dimensional figure found only on screens and magazines and you are and always will be a multidimensional being who has lived a roller coaster of a life. You are undeniably real and that is priceless.

​The so called imperfections you see in the mirror are the real you. A Rembrandt painting does not have the same brush strokes as a Van Gogh painting. Is one of them imperfect? If you walk into a museum of priceless works, are they all the same? Yes, you are as unique as any fine work of art. 

Look in that full length mirror again. Do you now see a work of art with depth and character and a hundred incredible stories? Do you see a body shaped by time, love and a lack of love? Can you look long enough to really see yourself because when you do you will find that the real you is looking back at you and thanking you for finally understanding and not judging. Your smile will be the signal that you got it. 

Patrick McBride’s Sundrops On Life 

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February 15th, 2016

 We cry. We beg. We make deals. We say we will do anything to find the solutions to our problems. We get very good at seeing our problems from every angle. We get very good at articulating our problem. We get very good at problem explaining. In fact we get so good that the solution, if it does exist, has no room to enter.

If a problem has a solution we must open a place for it’s appearance. Edison used to take a nap when no solution could be found and many times he would wake with the solution. If we keep intently focusing on the heads side of a coin we would never see the tails side even though it is so very, very close. The problem itself usually resides in chaos. The solution usually resides in relaxation. You cannot find them both in the same place.

But what if there is no solution? Understanding that there is no solution is an answer too. In that case get on with finding the courage to live with the unknowing. Maybe the solution will show up at a later date and maybe not. 

You do not have a magic wand. You are not the highest ranking being in the universe. There is a great power that “knows”. The problems in your life are for you to work on and for you to coexist with when necessary. 

If I may quote one of my favorite Sundrops – “The effort is up to you but the outcome is up to God.” Being okay with that is called Faith and Faith is a great source of both solutions and courage. Relax and give it a try. 


Patrick McBride’s Sundrops On Life 

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